While Cocooning has become a popular trend with many new parents, it’s not widely welcomed by family members and grandparents.
A perfect example, Nicholle and Brad Pritchard will bring their newborn baby home from the hospital to an apartment empty of all relatives and friends, including their parents.
The couple has chosen to have very strict visiting policies and there will be no guests allowed for two weeks after their arrival and that includes no sleep-overs!
At the end of the month, Brad, who is a digital media consultant will return to work when his paternity leave expires. Nicholle is an interior architect and designer, and she works from home. Both Nicholle and Brad’s parents will not be allowed to see their new baby until she is one month old.
An “important and delicate time”
Nicholle spoke about the arrangement:
She believes this is an “important and delicate time”. The couple believes there will be so many changes to get used to and even though everyone has the best intentions and want to help them out, they want this time to be strictly for Nicholle, Brad, and their newborn.
The days of relatives, including aunts, uncles, grandparents, and others racing off to the delivery room to meet the newest member of the family, is now in the past. First-time parents are wishing to spend time alone with their newborn which can be for weeks, and in some cases, months.
This is the newest trend known as “Cocooning”. This practice has been used when people adopt children, allowing the child to bond with their new parents.
Dana Dorfman, a psychotherapist, believes that this practice has grown in popularity since parental leave policies have become even more generous when it comes to dads. These new policies have given dads the opportunity to really bond with their new family.
Even if other family members dislike this “cocooning thing”, parents are embracing it as a wonderful time for mom and dad.
One new mom, Abby Reddel, said her sister was acting really badly about the situation and was constantly trying to bully her into letting family come over and see the baby.
Abby Reddel’s two-week cocooning period landed around Christmas so both sets of grandparents would have to spend the holiday at home, away from the new baby and their own children.
She said her father-in-law made constant hints that it would be perfect for their schedules if they could come over at Christmas and meet their grandchild.
She also said that her mother was hurt but she thinks if other people tried to help them and give advice, it would be frustrating. She added that her parents did abide by their wishes, taking “no” for an answer.
Author of “The Ultimate New Mom’s Cookbook”, Aurora Satler, said she and her husband had decided to cocoon their first child, four years ago.
As he was born during the flu season, they did not want him exposed. They informed their parents they could visit their grandson in a week but Aurora’s father just could not wait so showed up at the hospital!
She was so out of it, and maxed out on medications but was so thrilled about her new son that all she could say was “You’re here?” She did say, her father was really good about it, he got to hold his grandchild and then left.
They Don’t Want Any Help
Reddel’s mother said she was somewhat disappointed and was concerned if their new grandchild would even remember them. She did concede that the parents should have a special time with their baby first.
Now that Reddel is pregnant with their second child, she and her husband will not be using cocooning this time around. Times are changing as we speak and so are the needs for new parents to have some quality time with their newborn babies.
As hard as it might seem to other family members, especially grandparents, we all need to take a deep breath and let the parents get the last word. Cocooning is only for a short period of time so everyone should just reserve a little patience during this time and wait their turn.